Individuals who continue in self-sabotaging behavior, whether it is spiritually, emotionally, financially, relationally or physically all have one thing in common. They don’t know how to evaluate their experiences in a way that leads them to greater Lordship.
Subsequently, individuals who are successfully leading themselves and others are doing so because they walk in a high level of self-evaluation, learn from their mistakes and this makes them trust worthy even during times of apparent failure. When people know you have a high degree of transparency in your life and do regular self-evaluation, they feel safer and are willing to trust you through turbulent transitions.
Today, I want to share with you how to evaluate what you might feel like are negative experiences and avoid following the traditional road of going along with what the majority thinks. Another tactic of the enemy is making a decision because your afraid of what people will think of you. You will never carry the confidence necessary to be a leader unless you can do the following during a painful experience or conflict.
- Lordship is built by finishing, with clarity and power, what you started. Many times people will say God told them to do something. If God truly tells you to do something, he has already provided for you the way to complete it and transition into the next thing successfully. In prayer, when you have worshipped God and are still, ask the Holy Spirit this question. Am I believing a lie that I can’t continue this route and finish it with they way I intended to bring it to closure. Ditch the excuses on why you think it can’t be done, ask God for the ability to hear him and tap into your identity in Christ to finish like Jesus did.
- Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you if you are making reactive decisions out of anger or fear. Many times people give into the anxiety and pressure of a situation and make narcissistic decisions (which leads to them feeling like failures when it blows up). A simple self-evaluation asking the Holy Spirit in prayer to empower you to approach your challenge REALISTICALLY, preparing to make small changes that lead to peace is a route God can bless easily. Hint: Not just your peace but the peace and prosperity of a everyone involved.
- Are you recognizing and validating your feelings and others viewpoints. Many times people who come out of addiction based homes minimize their own feelings before others. When you don’t allow yourself to take the actions that validate your feelings, you will become passive aggressive. This one thing will save you tons of conflict as it’s a character issue. There is a way to validate how people feel (perhaps not their choices) and still keep unity. A solid time of prayer and worship will enable you to ask yourself this question in a detached manner.
- Is a compelling story in your life being built? Will this story if it comes to a good end help you share a testimony of God’s grace? If so, then before the Lord in prayer, ask him to make choices that are going to give you grace to weather the stress.
- Can you accept you failed and you are not a failure? If not, then you will feel victimized when you go through this challenge rather than growing in leadership. People who are shame-based internalize failure as who they are rather than accepting they needed to take more ownership and learn from their mistakes.
Did this help give you clarity? If so, share with me the one point that really spoke to you. Meet you in the comments!