Are you one of those individuals that has problems with consistent success? You start, but rarely finish?  If there is a pattern of this in your life, there are most likely underlying  spiritual issues that you need to resolve. In other words, you do not have a consistency issue, rather, you do not have clarity in Christ that in HIM, it is your identity to finish strong.

Where does this identity theft take place? Typically in your child- hood, during some kind of painful event. It could have been a physical challenge that caused you to feel victimized (one of mine was Asthma) or an authority figure in your life that no matter how hard you tried, you could never please. Somewhere along the lines, you made an inner vow that no matter how hard you tried, it didn’t matter because you were not going to win. So you began to settle.

The root of this began for me with an alcoholic father that could never be pleased. I remember one Saturday morning as a teenager, when Dad was sleeping late, getting up early to mow the lawn for him since he loved a manicured lawn. I did the front and back yards, picked up every stepping stone
on the front lawn to make it uniform and then patiently waiting for Dad to awake so he could be surprised. I walked with him out to the front yard, eagerly awaiting his approval. Instead, he began to point out to me all the places I missed and then walked back into the house matter-of-factly to get more coffee.
It hurt.

What identity did this produce in me as a leader? Someone who played it safe. A person who never wanted to be bold relationally and communicate my needs confidently because I could be rejected. A woman who never put 100% of my heart and passion into anything because the truth was, deep down I doubted I could deliver results. In my business? I compromised my fees and gave away my services. I settled (the first year) for clients that were half-hearted and wouldn’t take 100% ownership of their own success. My subconscious thought process? Well, I didn’t put my whole self into this project or relationship (or require a strong fee or commitment from the client) so I can’t be held responsible for lack luster results. In ministry? I waited to be “released” into my calling rather than apostolically move forward with boldness and let my fruit speak for my calling. Yikes! Can you see how I sabotaged my own success and provision repeatedly?

Other ways I sabotaged my own success:

• Negativity: By being critical, I removed myself as a participant and became a judge. That
  way, I never had to take ownership and risk failing.
• Perfectionism: I prevented myself from taking more territory and enlarging my personal life and
  business because I had to be perfect. I couldn’t take on big projects, relationships or goals because there was a possibility that I would make a mistake and fail. Then people would know the truth. I was a fake.
• I played the victim. When I felt out of control, I would constantly verbalize how stressed I was. This would cause me to attract people who were enablers and enjoyed rescuing. This really sabotaged me on teams, because we could never focus on a common goal since I was always diverting attention to myself.

If you recognize any of yourself in my old, sabotaging patterns, it’s time to build a
new identity!

One of the first things I did spiritually was write down this Scripture and quote it every day: “I am complete in HIM who is the head of all principality and power.” Colossians 2:10. He is enough. Your identity in HIM is to rule and reign in the heavenlies, far above all principalities and powers. NOW! TODAY! Your inheritance is to understand at a soul level you are deeply loved, highly favored and free
from all striving. You can be free to make plenty of mistakes and still get to eat the big enchilada at the end of the day.

Secondly, you can ask for feedback because that is all it is. Input to help you serve more people, more powerfully. You do not have to internalize failure because it is not who you are. If that doesn’t blow your socks off, I don’t what will!

When you encounter negative people or get poor feedback such as: you worked really hard and lost money; poured into people and you received no “Thank You” or respect; or you feel empty and lonely, it’s a sign [here's your sign! ] that you are not putting clear and healthy boundaries into place and you have removed yourself positionally from where you are supposed to be identity-wise.

Remember, settling for mediocrity may protect your heart from being hurt or negative feedback, but the price you will pay is relinquishing your destiny. Find partnerships and teams that will help you take big commitments, because every time you finish one, you will gain more confidence and affirmation for playing big!